


All's Fair in Love and War

by Homosexy



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, F/F, M/M, Space War, Trans Benji, bechloe - Freeform, side jenji, side-ish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-12
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-06-08 00:59:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6832426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Homosexy/pseuds/Homosexy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The peaceful planet nation of Barden is one day invaded by the power-hungry Streshan. Although Barden can win, they need help. The trade giant of Scion agrees to send forces. That's how Beca Mitchell ends up on an interplanetary flight, ready to leave behind everything that she can. Also aboard are Jesse Swanson, willing to serve his nation, and Benji Applebaum, hoping to help get his family out of poverty. On Barden, Commander Chloe Beale, despite her age, has been selected to lead a unit of Scion soldiers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So here it is, my multi-chapter space war bechloe epic! Also with jenji, because I love them. I hope I've managed to bring this world to life the way I saw it in my mind. This story is set far into the future, when humans have colonized much of space, but still kept some old traditions (like playing cards for instance). As I post this, I'm a fair way through it, but not halfway yet. I'll post a few chapters now to get you going, then hopefully it should be one a week. I hope you enjoy this!

No matter how devastating the oncoming events are, the night remains peaceful. The air is never thriving with a palpable tension. How can it be, if humans are not awake to say it is? In a small settlement in the furthest corners of the middle of nowhere, there was no need for a night watch, air scanners or radar. The sun-baked plains were peaceful, the nearest city far away. There was open space all around, but nobody could expect that to be a causal factor in anything, because nothing could possibly happen.

It was completely unpredictable.

No-one awoke until the fleet had landed. The move was unintentionally strategic; the enemy armies merely needed the open space and somewhere they could turn into a base, but the nearest military forces could never arrive in time to save this village. Anyone can fight, but only the few can win. A village of sleepy, unprepared civilians against an invading army?

The slaughter lasted less than twenty minutes. Minutes that stretched into purgatory as people ran and children screamed. The laser bullets glowed unnaturally in the dark, but only for an instant. That’s how long you had to appreciate the burning colour, beautiful in its own right, until you couldn’t appreciate anything anymore. The only mercy of it all was that deaths were quick; the battle was won with guns alone.

As if they’d have needed anything else against farmers and children.

Over in Astraeus, alarm bells were ringing. Military forces were being deployed to deal with the advancing invaders, but those higher up were receiving a message: an open declaration of war. An emergency meeting was declared in HQ, with commanders striding about and interns, who had found themselves wishing something would break the monotony of paperwork, cursing themselves.

“Are we all present?” John Smith asked in a commanding voice that was remarkably far from his usual, casual drawling tone  
“The strategic commander is just on her way, sir, the traffic has been terrible apparently” a blonde woman piped up. As she spoke, a tall woman, considerably younger than the rest of the party, briskly entered. She had long, dark blonde hair, upon which sat a pair of black-rimmed glasses.  
“Sorry I’m late, there was a transport hold-up” Stacie Conrad apologised briefly, before taking a seat  
“Miss Abernathy said” John scratched his head with aggression, “Miss Conrad, I’m afraid you’re in for a busy… well, God knows how long. As are we all” he took a deep breath, “The planet nation of Streshan has declared war on us, with the aim of invading and conquering. Shortly after stating their intentions, some of their troops were deployed in southern Trizus, directly outside Kurth Village. Ground report?” he glanced sharply at the woman three seats to his right  
“It is hard to say as yet sir, but we are predicting the entire population of Kurth Village to either be killed or captured, most likely the former. It is unlikely that any would escape, since the nearest civilisation or cover is miles away, across open land. The village is so isolated, our own forces will not reach the area in time” she replied, in a disproportionately calm voice  
“Sure a way to send a message. Thank you, Miss Fuentes” John replied shortly, “Miss Conrad, a summary of our situation?”  
“Based on what we know of our resources versus theirs, it’s not good. In terms of soldier quality, we have the advantage. But we are technological equals, and their man power exceeds ours by as much as 70% at the present time”  
“At the present time?” Gail Abernathy interjected

“Streshan have strong ties to multiple mercenary factions” Stacie explained, “The Viper Group, DSM Faction and the Crimson Brotherhood to name three. Their number of soldiers could potentially grow to around two and a half times the number we have. And that’s assuming they haven’t made any new alliances”  
“Any good news, Miss Conrad?”  
“Their leader is wanted for numerous crimes, all of which put a large bounty on his head. That means that they can’t ally with any nations, only mercenary factions”  
“Right, thank you” John said dismissively, “I suppose we have to put the news out, and hope that someone will help”

But who would? The planet of Barden had a peaceful history, mainly due to the fact it was in a lonely part of space. The nearest planet was Streshan, the warmongers themselves, and the nearest after that was the planet of Scion, which was nearly twice as far. Scion was a trade giant and hugely wealthy. This was largely due to the fact that it’s similarity to Earth had lead a lot of the moneyed to reside there, in the earlier days when humanity was still finding its feet in space. Stacie was not hopeful for an alliance; yes, Scion was undoubtedly an intergalactic power in its own right. It could deal with the costs of war. But why should they? Streshan would know better to attack Scion until they had a huge amount of forces, and even if that time came, Scion had the firepower to blast them out the sky before the enemy could even touch the atmosphere. If she were an advisor on Scion, she would advise against assisting Barden.

No-one was going to come and help them. They were a small planet, midway up the power and wealth scales, in an isolated quadrant of space. Every event, even the destruction of the planet itself, could never be anything more than a paragraph in the obscurest parts of a history file. Of course, they could probably win, or force stalemate alone. Stacie knew that. But the number of lives cost would be exceedingly, overwhelmingly huge.

Stacie Conrad was a genius. Holding the position of Strategic Commander at her age was unprecedented and the appointment had caused uproar (before she proved her worth). But all her intellect, knowledge, all the patterns she could see didn’t account for one thing on the side of Scion’s decision: empathy.

Barden was fortunate, that several of Scion’s current leaders had been in that position on their home planets before. They were also fortunate that Scion was currently ruled by the more outward looking faction of government, the group who didn’t look to build up their economic gigantism any further, but instead wished to make a difference with the power they had. It was luck, that only fourteen hours after the distress call, Scion agreed to offer their support. It was luck that they offered more assistance than Stacie Conrad had ever predicted they would.

It was pure chance that Soldier Beca Mitchell, of the planet Scion, ended up on a spaceship taking her somewhere she was going to stay for a very, _very_ long time. Of course, she didn’t know that. Beca Mitchell knew that she was travelling to a planet she’d never been to, in order to help fight an invading army she was pretty sure she’d never heard of. She knew that she was never going to get used to that rush at the beginning of a journey in a spaceship as they took off, which always made her feel nauseous, as if her stomach had tried to leap out of her body through her spine. She knew that she was finally going to get a new commander, who would hopefully not be a ridiculous, immovable traditionalist like her previous one.

Back on Barden, Commander Chloe Beale, selected as one of the leaders for Scion units operating on Barden, was preparing to meet her new soldiers.


	2. Arrival and Assignment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The soldiers are on their way to Barden. Beca becomes acquainted with two boys from the same town, Jesse and Benji. The new recruits prepare to be assigned to their units.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoy!

The ship hummed and Beca could feel the vibration in her ribcage. Flying wasn’t something she hated, but by no means was it her favourite pastime. The way take-off made her stomach swoop like a stunt craft. The way that, when you reached optimum height, the engines suddenly quieted and that fear that the ship would spiral back down to the ground crashed its way into Beca’s gut. Both were uncomfortable. The latter she refused to admit terrified her, even to herself.

Not that Beca had ever gone on an interplanetary flight.

The rush was even greater than usual; her body physically lurched into her belts as the craft started to ascend. Beca tried to slow everything down, praying that the guy next to her wouldn’t notice that she was breathing extremely heavily. He did give her a strange look, but said nothing. Perhaps he understood. She focused on the exact location of the buckles of her belts, the way they exerted a slight pressure as she breathed out, how the side of the seat felt under her clammy palms. Much too slowly, but at least eventually, her body returned to normal.

Upon leaving the atmosphere of Scion, the sound of the engines didn’t dull as much as Beca had been expecting. She breathed a sigh of relief, then narrowly avoided squeaking in surprise as the ship jolted violently  
“Guess that’s what happens when you leave a planet’s atmosphere” the guy next to her said, smirking  
“Not all of us have flown between planets before” Beca replied shortly  
“No, I haven’t” he grins, “I’m Jesse, what’s your name”  
“Beca”  
“You went real pale during take-off, Beca” he teased. Beca shot him a deathly glare, before muttering  
“Oh, brilliant” and rolling her eyes  
“We all have our weaknesses” Jesse can’t physically shrug because of his belts, but the casual motion is laced into his tone  
“Whatever” Beca replies, privately thinking he might feel some weakness if she kicked him in the  balls  
“So, this away mission, you excited?”  
“Jesse, we’re going to fight in an actual war. Are you actually five?”  
“I’m just trying to make conversation” he said defensively, “Where are you from then?”  
“Osiris” Beca replied, sarcastically adding, “The city of light, and prosperity!”  
“That good, huh?” Jesse raises an eyebrow  
“No, I’m being too harsh” Beca admits, “Most people are okay and as a city it’s not too bad I suppose”  
“Well, I’m from a little town that’s in the same region” Jesse shrugs, “No-one’s heard of it. There’s a guy here somewhere who’s from there too, I trained with him but he was pretty quiet, don’t know his name. He’s sat down the other end”  
“You’d probably rather sit by him than me then”   
“Not necessarily. You’re about as cute as each other, so…” as Jesse trailed off, Beca sighed deeply  
“You know, you really seem like a complete idiot” she said, “And I mean that in a nice way. Kind of”  
“Er, thanks” Jesse laughed, “And you must be one of the most antisocial people I’ve ever befriended”  
“That’s me” Beca grinned, “But don’t go thinking you’re my friend _just_ yet”

During a standard interplanetary flight as long as the one from Scion to Barden, undoing belts or getting out of seats was not permitted. Beca was itching to stretch her legs; the frustration slowly built inside her, a slow-burning intense feeling of irritation. Jesse immediately picked up on it. Quick to tease, he began to talk about how he used to enjoy living in a small town because he could go for long walks around the countryside. Beca felt that Jesse was quickly curating a collection of glares reserved just for him.

Jesse’s presence, however irritating and impossible to ignore, did seem to make the flight shorter. A busy mind like Beca’s was thankful for any distraction. Whether a stray daydream, or a particularly annoying brunette boy, anything was better than nothing. Jesse’s quirky honesty and off-kilter humour could have been endearing on a good day. Additionally, he appreciated some good sarcasm, something Beca was never short of.

The landing was nowhere near as nauseating as the take-off. The bumps and shudders were enough to prompt half the soldiers to jump, but Beca didn’t even so much as twitch. The desire to leave the spaceship was burning at its strongest. The metallic interior was smooth and sleek (certainly not ugly) but it afforded little in the way of excitement or detail. Though not uncomfortable, Beca was growing tired of her seat, with its cross-belt that started to dig in after so many minutes. She was rubbing her ribcage as she stood up, not caring that people might be looking. They could try being her.

The floor clanked monotonously as many pairs of boots traipsed over it, heading outside. Beca wished they could leave faster. But at least she wasn’t claustrophobic; that boy Jesse had pointed out was pale as anything. She felt sorry for him. He didn’t look to be cut out for the military, she had to be honest. It wasn’t stature- Beca herself was probably least suited on that front- but the look in his eyes that was startlingly similar to a naïve child, or maybe a small dog. He couldn’t have been more relieved to finally get outside, into a pleasant sunshine that Beca also greeted gladly. The ground was a little dried out, suggesting that it hadn’t rained for a few weeks. Wherever they were, it seemed to have a warm climate. The grass was still green, but yellowing in patches, as well as coarser and harsher in texture than the lush meadows she’d seen outside Osiris.

“Glad to be outside?”  
“Yup” Beca replied without looking at Jesse, who had apparently made it his duty to talk to her every time he was stood within ten feet’s distance.  
“It’s warm here”  
“Yeah, not as rainy as Osiris at least” Beca muttered, before hastily going silent. As the troops had lined up (with Jesse unfortunately directly next to her), an important looking man had stood on a raised platform. His presence instantly commanded silence. It was dignified without any arrogance. Beca sensed that he was stern and to be respected.   
“All soldiers will be shown to down rooms until collected for unit assignment.” he barked, “Your units here will not correspond to any previous assignments on Scion, is that clear?”  
The assembly saluted in unison  
“Each line will be led by a random commanding officer to their assigned rooms. Please stay there until further notice. Dismissed!”  
Beca saw Jesse’s line led off by an attractive redhead, who she immediately looked away from.

Time and a place.

The rec rooms were nice enough. Plain walls, furniture in an assortment of bright colours and several forms of entertainment. None of which Beca felt like using. She walked past the already crowded games tables, past a group eagerly playing some betting game and flopped into a spare chair. Before noticing that the one next to it was already occupied and she was probably going to have to have a conversation now  
“Hi” the guy said nervously; it was the guy from Jesse’s town  
“Hi, uh…”  
“My name’s Benji” he added quickly  
“Hi Benji, listen, I don’t want to be rude but I don’t feel like talking much if that’s okay” Beca tried to be apologetic while also brisk  
“No, it’s fine” he wasn’t at all taken-aback, “I get it”  
“Well, thanks. Where you from?” Beca said, his easy-going attitude now making her actually _want_ to talk to him  
“Just this little village, Newith”  
“Oh yeah, I sat next to this guy Jesse who’s from there” Beca rolled her eyes, “Pain in the ass, but he seems alright”  
“He was in my training unit” Benji smiled, “Decent guy”  
“I guess”  
“What about you?”  
“Oh, I’m from Osiris” Beca shrugged  
“Wow!” Benji exclaimed, “I’ve always wanted to go but I… well my family isn’t very rich” he finished shyly  
“Hey, no judgement here. I’ve come to learn that wealth doesn’t dictate character so…” Beca trailed off, feeling like she’d just said something very pretentious. But Benji didn’t seem at all put-off  
“What’s the big city like then?” he asked eagerly.

Beca explained for a while about the blue-lit highways, tall glass towers and seemingly constant rain. But really, she wanted to know more about life in a village. Benji was happy to oblige, though constantly adding in phrases like “Nothing special” or “Probably not that interesting”. Beca found him quite likeable and though she grudgingly had gotten along with Jesse, Benji was someone she could definitely befriend.

A serious looking woman suddenly entered the room, prompting all chatter to cease  
“Soldier 09785, Beca Mitchell and 10550 Benji Applebaum with me to be assigned to Beale Unit” she announced tonelessly. Beca looked at Benji and half-smiled, before both of them got up and left the room. They followed the woman through several monochrome corridors, then outside into the sunlight, ready to meet their new comrades.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmu at lostbechloe.tumblr.com with any questions you got


	3. Commander Chloe Beale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca's unit assignment contains more than one surprise, as Beca, Jesse and Benji find out who their new commanding officer will be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hold on to your pants ldies, it's the moment you'ev been waiting for. also hope you don't mind that I've just totally made up how this army works. As ever, I hope you enjoy!

The first thing Beca noticed was that wherever they were on Barden, the afternoons were cooler than the mornings. It wasn’t cold; if anything the coolness was pleasant. She wasn’t really one for hot weather anyway. The second thing she noticed was that Jesse was there.

Brilliant.

He smiled enthusiastically at her and Benji. Beca noticed that Jesse’s gaze seemed to linger on him equally as long as it did on her and, with a smirk, noted that maybe she and Jesse did at least have one thing in common. She wiped the smile off her face the moment it occurred he might read it the wrong way. Inevitably, he would. From then on, she used the tried-and-tested poker face of annoyed disinterest that had often proved useful throughout the years. This seemed to amuse Jesse, who started animated conversation with a moderately mystified Benji. A few more people arrived and Jesse did not give up on his attempts to coax her into the conversation. Apparently, he seemed to enjoy teasing her and trying to frustrate her. More annoyingly, he was very good at it.

The ranks hushed as they collectively saw a movement somewhere to the left. Whoever their new commanding officer was, they were about to find out. Jesse elbowed Beca; evidently he had noticed the fact she was staring when they had first arrived. Or more accurately, exactly where Beca was looking. Out in front of them strode the attractive redhead whom Beca had noticed. Everyone in the universe was taller than Beca, but this woman looked to only have a few inches on her. Her red hair was neatly tied back into a bun (though Beca still managed to notice that it curled). She wore what was clearly Barden’s standard military uniform, except for a few metal badges on the collar. Beca had no idea what they indicated, but realised if she stared at them any longer than Jesse would never let her live it down. Resolutely, she stared slightly to the right of that lovely hair and pretended she didn’t notice the freckles on this woman’s face.

The smirk on Jesse’s face was palpable.

“My name is Commander Chloe Beale. I have been assigned as a commander for troops of foreign soldiers” she said. She was smiling, but something told Beca that this was not someone to be messed with. What that something was, Beca was not prepared to explore now, or anytime in the next eon.   
“While you’re here, all soldiers will receive the same basic training: theory lessons on our planet’s geography, with specific reference to placements of military bases. In time, this will move on to more relevant information based on the enemy’s movements, as well as various other pieces of military information that our own soldiers our familiar with” she paused, as if checking to see that she had their full attention. Once fully satisfied, she continued;  
“Aside from that, what you do for physical training is down to your commander. If you have been wondering why the Scion soldiers were not briefed as a whole, you will naturally now understand why. Here on Barden, we focus on efficiency. Techniques are of course standardised, but we find that an individual approach to combat based on factors such as size, intelligence and strengths creates a stronger fighting force. But naturally, due to our unique style, different commanding officers interpret this differently”  
There was a collective anticipation from the Scion soldiers, to find out exactly what their new commander’s opinion was  
“As a unit, we should be unified. Therefore, all organised physical training will be done together. That doesn’t mean you can’t adjust techniques to your own strengths, but the important thing is that we are a united force that can effectively protect civilians. The better our cooperative work, the better we do our job.”

Beca’s momentary jitters at Commander Beale’s appearance had been forgotten. Her words were riveting. Begrudgingly, Beca had to admit she was a little inspired. But most of what she felt was relief; this was as far removed from her previous commanding officer as she could have hoped. Chloe Beale, if her speech was to be believed, was not a rigid traditionalist. Immovable on team unity, maybe, but that wasn’t something Beca was bothered about challenging. Finally, she might have a commander who actually _knew what she was doing_.

“You’ve already undergone basic training on Scion. However, I shall initially continue basic training drills with the weapons and equipment the Barden army uses. The differences are very slight, but it will matter on the battlefield. Additionally, you will be trained in our style of hand-to-hand combat. You may use these skills however you choose. No extra training will be scheduled in downtime unless in a one-off situation. I expect you to use and manage your time wisely. Is that clear?”

The ranks saluted. Most of them, whether at first uncertain or not, now felt they were in good hands. Commander Beale exuded an aura of capability. It occurred to Beca that she could only be a couple of years older than herself, yet she already held the rank of commanding officer. Her blue eyes (which Beca had been avoiding looking at) were determined, resolute. Not the stubborn, obstinate will that Beca often had, but a calm assurance that she would work for her goal, no matter how hard the road.

“I look forward to working with you all, dismissed!” Although she hadn’t stopped smiling through the speech, it seemed to somehow intensify as she rounded off her speech and, despite all cynicism, Beca really believed her. Benji shrugged hopefully at her as they made eye contact. Jesse meanwhile, looked delighted. This could only mean bad things.   
“What do you think?” he murmured to Beca and Benji as the troops started to disperse  
“Seems okay” Beca replied noncommittally, “Better than my last one anyway”  
“Oh I _know_ what you think, I wasn’t talking to you” Jesse grinned smugly, before turning to Benji. Beca was considering slapping him until Chloe’s voice called  
“Can Soldier Number 09785 Beca Mitchell please remain behind? The rest of you may leave; there will be no training today”  
Jesse looked as though Christmas had come early  
“Wow” he laughed, “Have fun then”. Benji didn’t seem to know what to say and nodded.  
“You’re so dead later” Beca hissed as he walked off. The swagger in Jesse’s walk only became more pronounced at his success in riling her. Beca exhaled sharply to calm down. Nervously, she made her way toward Commander Beale.

Now more than ever, she really wanted to avoid looking. Not that it was a thing. More that she wanted to prevent it ever being so in the first place. She looked fixedly at a point somewhere to Commander Beale’s left, trying not to look at her hands as her eyes travelled there  
“Are you feeling alright Mitchell?”  
“Yes… Commander Beale” Beca added hurriedly on the end of her sentence  
“You can drop the Commander, Mitchell” Beca wasn’t looking, but she could hear the smile  
“Yes, Beale” Beca replied, trying to add it nonverbally out of reflex, “So, may I ask why I’ve been held back?” she swallowed drily. Somehow, this was making her nervous  
“Before you arrived, I was sent the records of my new troops. I think there’s something on yours that merits discussion”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you wanna show me any questions that you gotch, hmu at lostbechloe.tumblr.com ;P


	4. Goods and Bads

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca's fresh start on Barden becomes considerably bumpier when her previous record is brought up by Commander Beale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay! I'm mid-exams (like really important ones), so I totally forgot to post on Friday. I hope you enjoy :)

Beca’s stomach sank. She knew that this would come up. It would have been foolish to assume otherwise, but she’d pushed the matter from her mind, instead choosing to think of the fresh start she would have. Beca swallowed again, quietly looking at the ground while awaiting further comment. She examined the minute cracks in the earth; it was not so dry as to bake the earth, but certainly far from lush. Here there was no grass; it was confined to the edges of several large areas where it had been worn away from being trampled on by boot after boot. Unfortunately, her riveting inspections could only last a few seconds before inevitably being interrupted  
“You’ll be pleased to hear I have no comments about your practical assessment scores. They are excellent by almost all standards, nearly faultless even” as Chloe paused, Beca wished she would just stop there. She felt a glowing pride at the praise, a rare sensation. But, as she well knew, good news comes before bad and pride seems to only ever lead to an embarrassing fall  
“However, your comments from your previous commanding officer, Commander Posen, are cause for concern”  
Beca waited in trepidation  
“Please relax, Mitchell” Commander Beale said evenly, “Comments like these are not unusual. Interpersonal interactions can differ; I’m not particularly worried about any authority issues.”

Beca noted the use of “particularly”  
“While her criticisms of your technique are hard to gauge, I’m sure they cannot be baseless. This is not an insult to you. But any problems must be addressed, so you have extra training scheduled in the evenings. It’s on your timetable, though I’m aware you will not have received them yet. Your first session will be tomorrow night”  
“May I ask what these sessions entail?” Beca asked, feeling pretty sure she knew the answer  
“One-on-one training so I can fully assess you, in order to judge for myself whether your previous Commanding Officer was correct”  
“Right” Beca replied politely. She did understand, but it was such an annoyance to have to go through this when she knew full well there was nothing wrong with her technique. Her anger was entirely directed toward Commander Posen; Commander Beale was acting completely fairly, given the situation  
“I’m sorry, but this is necessary and a recommendation of my superiors” Chloe’s tone was apologetic and Beca was so startled she looked straight at Commander Beale  
“You could tell I was annoyed?” she asked in surprise  
“I know it’s not directed at me, don’t worry” Chloe assured her, “But yes, I could. You could say I’m good at reading people, which I wouldn’t deny, but I think you’re easy to read. That’s not a bad thing” she added the moment Beca started to feel the tiniest bit uneasy, “It means you’re passionate and strong-willed and that you probably stand up for yourself. Sounds like good soldier material to me”  
“Thank you, Beale” It sounded like a question. In truth, Beca was unsure how to navigate this. It was different to any dynamic she was used to. Though she preferred this more equal approach, she still worried that she wasn’t showing enough respect to her superiors. Regardless of the fact she never managed to take compliments with much grace anyway  
“That’s quite alright. You’re dismissed, Mitchell” she smiled, with a gleam of knowledge or _something_ in her eye that somehow made Beca feel as though Chloe Beale had just looked right through her. The notion scared her. People who could read through every façade she threw at them, like Jesse and apparently Commander Beale too, made her nervous.

Beca was just going to leave, preparing herself for the inevitable taunting she would receive in ten minutes, when she realised she wasn’t sure where she was meant to be heading to. She slowly turned back around on the spot, to face Commander Beale  
“Um, excuse me but the others were escorted back and I don’t actually know where I’m meant to go” Beca said awkwardly, feeling fairly idiotic. She was quickly proving herself to be, for a soldier, incapable on just about every count. To her surprise, Commander Beale didn’t seem the least bit surprised, disappointed or exasperated. Instead, she smiled apologetically and said  
“My mistake, I’ll escort you”

Beca’s journey back through the monochrome network was marked by her refusal to look anywhere but the floor. She’d been here for all of a few hours and already was depending on someone so stupidly, having to follow her commanding officer around like a lost child. She’d made her way there from the rec room, shouldn’t she be able to remember the way back? Beca reasoned with herself that just because she started in the rec room doesn’t mean that’s where she’s meant to be now. But the overwhelming feeling of being unreliable and somehow disappointing returned in all its familiar, choking glory. Surreptitiously, Beca shook her head as if trying to dislodge water from her ears. Commander Beale’s eyes flicked sideways at the movement, but she made no comment.

The walk continued in silence, save for the sound of boots on a shiny floor. The clunks and squeaks jumped out at Beca painfully, making her feel yet more awkward. She looked away from the floor, at the equally monotonous wall to her left. Occasionally, it would be broken by a window or door, maybe the odd message board. The five minute walk had easily stretched into a century for Beca; the distance between one door and the next seemed far too long. Every time they passed yet another unknown room, Beca was caught between desperately wishing she could escape to wherever she was meant to be and clinging on to this long, painful, awkward journey like she didn’t want it to end. Several times, she felt as though she ought to break the silence. But no words came and her mouth felt dry and uncomfortable.

After a what Beca could only deem an unpleasant experience that was fuzzy at the edges, Commander Beale gestured to a door, labelled “R-011”  
“Here we are” she said  
“Thank you” Beca said respectfully, dipping her head a little as she went to open the door  
“I’m sure you’ll get the run of the place soon” Chloe said encouragingly as Beca left for the company of her fellow soldiers. Commander Beale might have read her feelings with more accuracy than Beca herself sometimes managed, but if she thought that the lingering weight in Beca’s stomach was just about getting lost, she really wasn’t as good at reading people as she might think.


	5. Back To School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The soldiers get settled in to their new regimes and Beca has her first session of extra training

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so this hasn't gone as well reception wise as I had hoped, but I'm still going to finish it because this fic is my child i swear (tbh im probably not cut out for all this serious multi-chapter shit, I think short and funny is probably more my thing). But for those of you reading, thank you and I hope you enjoy! Eventually this will hopefully become as beautifully written as it looked in my head because i fell in love with the idea and i am definitely not doing it justice

Beca had not shut the door fast enough to hide her companion from Jesse, who sprung up out of his chair. She pretended to ignore him, instead noting that they were not the only unit present; soldiers she didn’t recognise, about enough to make up one other unit, were hanging out there too. In some cases they mingled with the other members of Beale Unit, while others were keeping their social circles unit-exclusive. Beca didn’t care either way, but given that she had wandered over to Jesse and Benji, there was no way she could pretend to ignore the former any longer  
“She took you back here?”  
“I didn’t know the way” Beca sighed, “And before you ask what it was, I’ve got to do extra training some evenings. First one’s tomorrow”  
Jesse guffawed. Benji looked surprised and torn as to whether to laugh with Jesse or sympathise with Beca. He ended up going for a weak smile  
“You’re gonna love it” Jesse grinned slyly, “Some alone time with Commander Hotpa-“  
“Who said it was one-to-one?” Beca shot back, fully aware that this argument was never going to go anywhere  
“But it is though, isn’t it? Isn’t it?” Jesse pressed   
“Well, yeah” Beca muttered. Jesse laughed in victory and Beca kicked him vehemently in the shin  
“So,” Beca directed at Benji, “What have you been up to in my absence?”  
“Playing cards, chatting. You weren’t gone for that long” Benji shrugged, “We’re sharing this rec room with Banks Unit, guess it’s alphabetical or something, however they're organizing this”  
“Yeah, that’s what we think” Jesse said, rubbing his sore shin, “It's nice that we can relax today though, well except you. Dinner’s in a couple hours, they’ll come get us”  
“Oh, great,” Beca rolled her eyes, “120 hungry minutes and I have to spend them with you”

She had the great satisfaction of easily outdoing both Benji and Jesse at cards. Annoyingly, she proved her prowess so quickly that Jesse could not be convinced to bet anything on their games. Try as she might, it seemed Beca would never be able to embarrass him quite as well as he did her  
“Nice try” he laughed, “But I think I know when to play the coward”  
“Damn right you do” Beca muttered darkly  
“I’ll play if you like” Benji offered. Beca knew he was only doing it in case she was actually upset  
“No, dude” she said, “As competitive as I am, I don’t have the heart to publicly embarrass you”  
Jesse made a huffy, offended noise and raised his eyebrows  
“ _You_ deserve it” She explained  
“What have I ever done?” he asked innocently  
“Exist” Beca shrugged. Benji whistled, while Jesse promptly started to laugh  
“Cold, Becs” he protested, “I’m glad you’re on my side”

The next day was a typical early rise. Beca stumbled blearily out of her bunk; even when used to it, mornings this early were not cool at all. Everyone around her seemed to be mostly in the same situation. She pulled on an undershirt with all the enthusiasm of a grumpy sloth, before slapping herself on the face with both hands. Mildly more awake, Beca continued to dress. The standard uniform of Barden seemed easier to pull on than the Scion stuff, but maybe she was just biased. She already liked this place more than her home planet, even if she had not yet walked its surface for 24 hours. She just managed to clumsily lace her boots, knowing that those knots were going to come back to bite her in around 14 or so hours.

When she reached the canteen, she felt almost halfway to awake. Maybe it was the fact she’d had to think about how to get there. Jesse and Benji were already sat down, chatting animatedly. Well, Benji was. Jesse looked ready to drop off. With a purposeful clatter, Beca slid her tray down opposite him  
“Morning”  
“Hi” Benji said, “Good sleep?”  
“S’pose” Beca muttered through a mouthful of food, “Better than Jesse by the looks”  
Jesse groaned groggily  
“Shut your mouth”  
“Yessir” Beca said, shoving yet another gargantuan forkful into her mouth. Benji looked somewhere between awed and concerned  
“Should you-“  
“It’s fine” Beca assured him, “How are you so awake anyway? I’m used to this but I still want to sleep for another three hours. How do you do it?” she jabbed her fork in his direction  
“I always had to help out at home- my family are farmers, mainly crops rather than animals, but it’s still a lot of work. Plus, getting ready and…” he trailed off, somewhat awkwardly  
“Fair enough” Beca shrugged and Jesse made a noise of agreement  
“You should eat” Benji said   
“Yeah, you don’t want me to beat you at everything by even more than I already will” Beca added airily. Jesse shot up off the table and began eating even faster than Beca. Benji sighed deeply. It was like watching over squabbling children.

Jesse started to act like a living human being again about five minutes before their first theory brief. Beca was pushing herself through her tiredness with as much determination as she could muster. It felt like trying to sprint through treacle. As the door opened, she hastily cut her debate with Jesse and Benji about design to a stop. She was ready for the elbow Jesse tried to nudge her with, knocking it off course without even looking.

“For those of you not part of my unit, my name is Commander Chloe Beale. I’ll be taking your theory brief today.” She paused like she had done when addressing her soldiers, “You’ll be pleased to know that it’s mostly individual study. On your screens you have access to maps detailing biomes, geology, location of water and so on, in different layers that you can turn on and off as you please. You’ll also be able to find information about the climates of various countries and regions. As much as I don’t want to treat you like children, can we ask that any discussion is kept to minimal volume and that if you have any questions, you raise your hand. As well as myself, Commander Luke Stroma” she gestured to a tall blonde man leaning against the left wall, “And Emily Junk, who is the on-base Data Manager and probably more knowledgeable than myself or Commander Stroma”. A tall brunette woman in office clothing smiled somewhat shyly from a corner.   
“You will receive weekly tests to ensure that you have been putting the work in. That’s it.” She glanced at Commander Stroma, who nodded, “This session will last two hours. That may sound long, but there’s a lot to take in and note down.”

Beca quickly moved between the layers of the map, examining rainfall and altitude patterns. After going over the main bodies of water, she had a look at some images of the actual terrain. This was surprisingly interesting, for someone who loathed studying. Occasionally, Jesse would turn to ask her if she’d seen some mountain range or waterfall, but more often he and Benji would enter animated conversation about river systems. Although there were a few dry plains, the planet was mostly quite lush. Scion was far more temperate; Barden was warm for most of the year, apart from in the north where the winters could become bitterly cold.

After about an hour, Beca still had plenty to look at and discover, but there was something missing from this otherwise comprehensive set up. She raised her hand. Commander Beale arrived after a few seconds  
“What is it, Mitchell?”  
“Well, what about human stuff? Like land use, so we can see food sources and what water systems are important to the population, as opposed to what water systems are just, well, there”. Commander Beale looked surprised, but not unhappy. On the contrary, she smiled and said  
“Very astute. But we thought we’d leave that out for the first lesson. Besides, you can’t have run out of things to occupy you yet can you?”  
“No” Beca replied hurriedly, “I just… I was just wondering”  
“No problem, Mitchell” she replied, before walking over to another soldier who had raised his hand.  
“Jesse, don’t even think about it” Beca muttered the moment he opened his mouth  
“Okay, okay” Jesse laughed defensively, “I was actually going to say how I hadn’t even thought about that and you’re pretty good but sure, refuse my compliments”  
Beca stared at him. That was not what she had expected. Though Jesse laughing at her shocked expression and gaping mouth was entirely predictable.

Chloe looked curiously at Beca Mitchell. Who was this soldier with apparent “disregard for military convention, as well as authority”, because she sure as hell wasn’t seeing it. At the moment, she seemed to be honest and a creative thinker. She’d have to reserve judgment until that night’s training session but there was something that made her stand out. Maybe it was that she was completely unafraid to ask questions, or that slightly awkward air like she was constantly trying to hide something. Whatever it was, Chloe resolved to keep an eye on her.

Maybe both eyes.

“She was watching you, you know”  
“She was watching everyone, dumbass,” Beca replied through a mouthful of food, “It was slightly her job to oversee the whole session”  
“Doesn’t explain why she kept glancing your way” Jesse said smugly  
“You were sat next to me, she could easily have been looking at you. Wondering how your face ended up the way it is” Beca gestured at Jesse’s general existence  
“Do you have to be so cold?” he complained, “It’s not like you’d have a problem being the opposite”  
“Can you just stop that? Like everything that you’re doing?” Beca furrowed her brow  
“I’ll take that as a yes then”

 

Beca turned up to her evening training five minutes early. Chloe was apparently ready anyway  
“You learned your way around then?” she asked  
“Seems so, Comm- er, Beale”  
“Well, that’s good” her eyes twinkled a little at Beca’s slip up, but otherwise she paid it no attention as she continued, “I thought we’d start with basic shooting”

Beca rolled her eyes, but only once Chloe’s back was turned. If it was going to be shooting, this training session would be over in ten minutes. Whether that was good or bad, she hadn’t yet decided. Chloe was swiping through menus on a holoscreen, evidently trying to find something. Eventually her face (which Beca was minutely watching) lit up with recognition. Several targets appeared and they were definitely not moving ones  
“We’ll start with just static shooting” she explained. Beca wondered how anyone managed to keep their voice so bright whenever they spoke  
“Yes, Beale” she played along, casually taking up position. This was going to be interesting.

Chloe felt like she’d barely blinked, and suddenly every target had a hole through dead centre. She went on to blink multiple times at Beca, apparently speechless. The soldier looked up at her, feigning ignorance  
“So, how was that?” The nerves in Beca’s voice sounded genuine, or maybe she was imagining it, The woman’s expression was the perfect picture of innocence, so much that it almost made her laugh  
“Ridiculous” Chloe said truthfully, “That may be one of the most outstanding shooting performances I’ve ever seen”  
“So, what next?” Beca asked slyly  
“Well I think we’ll skip through moving targets and make you move as well” Chloe pressed a button and patch of orange light appeared on the floor “You have to follow its path”  
“Got it” Beca nodded, before turning to face her field.

Chloe was almost beyond surprised. She’d never seen anyone shoot so naturally. It was as if Beca did it instinctively (which was a scary thought to entertain). Her movement was fast and fluid, an effortless transition from one perfectly aimed pin-point shot to the next. Unorthodox, maybe, but effective and almost a thing of beauty to witness. Surprised didn’t even cover it.

Beca secretly felt immensely pleased. Her narcissism was bothering her, but no more than a little niggling in the back of her mind. It was so nice to be acknowledged by… well, anyone, as being good at something. As having talent. As worthy of any kind of praise. To be told these things by her commanding officer made her feel happier than she could remember feeling for a while. Like the feeling was filling her to the brim, which admittedly made her feel a little stupid. Childish. But the truth was shooting just came naturally to her. Aiming felt easy and the entire process was smooth, simple. She felt it should have bothered her, but Beca was more relieved that she was good at something.

“Well, I can’t really fault you” Chloe conceded none too unhappily, “The only comment I have is that your fluidity is unusual. From a traditionalist point of view, it would be discouraged as bad practice for aiming but, well, that’s one of the best performances I’ve seen”  
“Is that another thing that’s different from Scion? That kind of attitude?” Beca asks  
“Yes, I think so. I’ve never been to Scion myself though”  
“You’re not missing much” Beca laughed drily, “It’s odd though, I’m pretty sure Commander Posen is from here, originally”  
“She is, we actually trained together” Chloe smiled a little, “I’m surprised too. May I ask your take on her criticisms of your reception of authority?”  
“Well,” Beca scrunched her nose, “It’s more like, uh, her authority specifically. Because her way of doing things seemed fairly stupid, in no disrespect” Beca added hastily, “I just felt like that, in the field although I’ve never been in it, which obviously makes what I’m saying seem idiotic, but her methods felt clunky. Like if we used them, they’d work because they’re tried and tested, but we’d lose more life than necessary”  
“That would explain it” Chloe paused, “Don’t take this as a lack of faith Mitchell, but I would have to see these methods for myself before agreeing or disagreeing with your comment”  
“Of course, I wouldn’t expect otherwise” Beca looked at the floor. She really wasn’t disappointed, more embarrassed. Commander Beale sounded, if anything, supportive.

She wasn’t used to that.


	6. Rivals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca rediscovers her competitive streak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is a short trashy filler chapter, sorry but you're gonna get a few of those! Hope you enjoy nonetheless

Beca minded a little bit that she had to continue doing extra training, but not too much. It wasn’t like the sessions were boring. Given that she was working on her skills at the same time, she was very close to being happy about the matter. Commander Beale had insisted that Beca continue her individual training, because “A history of reluctance to follow orders needs to be monitored”.  
  
“Is that really what she said?” Jesse guffawed, “More like she wants to monitor your ass”  
“Fuck off”  
“I know I would”  
Beca punched him in the shoulder, but Jesse continued laughing. Benji was giggling too, in that strange adorable way he had  
“Did she really say you were the best shot she’d seen?” Benji asked  
“Pretty much” Beca shrugged, “She said one of the best though, it isn’t like I’m that good or-“  
“Shut up, your shooting scores in our unit training have been way above everyone’s” Jesse complained, “You’re basically a prodigy”  
“You’re basically a dick, your point being?” Beca retorted  
“Don’t we have a test or something today?” Benji interrupted worriedly  
“Yeah, if we score high enough then we don’t do any more theory lessons” Jesse grinned  
“Thank god” Beca sighed. She was sick of them by now.

The test was largely uneventful. Beca was pretty sure it was an order from higher up- none of the commanding officers seemed to really care. Soon enough, everyone was cleared to completely finish their theory studies- in geography anyway. They still had some “allotted study time”, whatever that was. Beca would rather just work out.

The fact that there was yet more theory, despite promises of it ending, was less than thrilling, but the prospect of an assault course certainly cheered up Beale Unit. They gathered around Commander Beale, as she explained their task  
“The goal is to finish, quickly but also efficiently. Don’t think I’ll only be looking at how fast you go. Naturally though, it’s safe to assume that if you’re finishing this quickly then you’re doing fine. We haven’t trained together that regularly so far, though that will change now, so think of this as a small assessment, or check point for me to see your current condition. And by the way,” she added, “There is a benchmark time, but I’m not telling you what it is. Good luck”

Beca grinned. She went for a run whenever she could. It cleared her head. Jesse joined her for maybe a third of them, but he’d rather work on his fitness in other ways (not that she didn’t like training in the gym, but in her free time Beca would infinitely rather be outside). Beca preferred not having him around. Under normal circumstances, his conversation didn’t annoy her nearly so much as she pretended it did, but running was the one time she really did want him to keep quiet. Running was what she did to feel calm, to forget everything in her life, past or present. It all just came down to the breeze she felt on her skin, the slightly uneven ground keeping her literally on her toes, and those ambient noises that seemed to come exclusively from being outside and nowhere else. But the moment someone said a word to her, the world came crashing back and her calm, serene place was gone.

Benji was up first. Beca thought he was alright- his movements were good, but not exactly fast. Still, she congratulated him heartily as the next soldier stepped up. By the time it was Beca’s turn, Benji’s time ranked about midway through the unit. Having surveyed all the previous attempts of her fellow soldiers, Beca knew exactly where she was going to struggle. She’d just have to make up for it on the rest.

“Trust you to finish fastest” Benji laughed, “That was pretty impressive”  
“Thanks” Beca replied. She was fairly pleased with how she had done, although as she predicted, the vertical aspects had been her weak point.  
“We’ll see if you’re still the fastest once I’m done” Jesse challenged  
“You probably will be” Beca shrugged, “Did you see how much trouble I had because of being kind of tiny?”  
“So you admit you’re short?” Jesse asked quickly  
“Only I can say it” Beca replied, hitting him for good measure

Sure enough, Jesse did end up finishing faster than everyone else, with Beca only slightly behind. Overall, she might have been more mobile but the fact was Jesse could scramble over stuff a lot faster than she could. Close to the entire unit had gotten past the walls faster than her, but her mobility just about made up for the lack of height. Second fastest in the unit was definitely not bad; she felt very pleased.

Although Jesse’s bragging could well drive her insane.  
  
“I beat you” he grinned for the seventh time. Beca rolled her eyes, past having the patience to deign to respond  
“Aren’t you impressed?” he continued  
“No” Beca shrugged, “You’re taller than me”  
“You know what they say about tall people”  
“And you know what they say about overcompensating” Beca retorted   
“Don’t be so harsh” Jesse mock whined. Benji patted him on the shoulder and no-one was sure if he was serious or not. Beca didn’t miss the look on Jesse’s face, raising an eyebrow at him. Jesse looked like a small child who’d been caught gorging himself on sweets. Beca laughed  
“So,” Jesse continued smoothly, “You’re my rival now, Becaww”  
“Do you have to call me that? And why, exactly?”  
“Because I only beat you by this much” Jesse held thumb and forefinger almost touching, “We’ve got to compete now”  
Beca considered it. She didn’t really see the point, other than it might be fun. But then, she considered, wouldn’t it motivate her to perform better? Beca was not someone to pass up a boost to her otherwise highly inconsistent levels of motivation   
“You’re on” she smirked, “Don’t complain when I beat you at everything”  
“Please” Jesse scoffed, “You’re so going down”

Beca was starting to like Jesse more. His annoying streak became kind of funny eventually (until he carried on too long, like when they were running). And Benji was nicer than anyone else she could remember meeting. It wasn’t too bad, for being thrown into a group of people she didn’t know. Frankly, Commander Beale was the best she could have hoped for after being stuck under Commander Posen for far too long. Better, probably. Feeling bored, nervous and mildly irritated on the ship to Barden seemed far longer ago than Beca knew it was.

Somehow, this had all turned out better than she expected.


	7. Stories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca, Jesse and Benji start to delve into their pasts, military and otherwise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so this is getting dangerously close to where I'm at with the writing (like within 6 chapters) but hopefully whenever a break does occur it won't be ridiculously long. Also sorry for more short filler chapters. As ever, hope you enjoy!

Jesse continued trying to compete with Beca at just about everything. She had him beaten at shooting, but he was physically far more powerful (understandably, given the ten or so inches of height Beca gave up). Although she kept the appearance of being uncaring, his challenge brought out her competitive side and she found herself trying just that little bit harder so she could top him. After what Beca considered far too long, he’d learned not to talk to her while they were running. Overall, now that she had more free time, Beca was finding he was a fairly bearable person.

The decrease in number of individual sessions with Commander Beale meant that she was getting to spend more time with Jesse and Benji. They wasted no time in teaching her various card games  
“I don’t understand how you don’t know any of these” Benji sighed, as they went over the rules for the fourth time  
“I guess my dad was a philistine” Beca shrugged, “This hand would beat yours, right?”  
“For someone who has no clue what they are doing, you’re good at this” Jesse complained. He had lost five straight games  
“I’m just naturally talented” Beca flipped her hair, making sure to catch him on the face  
“Speaking of,” Benji said, “Why did you even have to do extra training? You’re better than me at most things”  
“My old commander, the one who was in charge while I was doing my training, she didn’t like me all that much”  
“How come?” Jesse asked  
“It’s a long story and probably a boring one at that”  
“I don’t care, tell us anyway” Jesse insisted  
“Fine” Beca rolled her eyes.

Commander Posen had always been strict. She had a reputation for teaching soldiers incredibly solid fundamental skills. Those who did their training under her usually ended up going places in the military. Beca wasn’t delighted with her uptight official, but she figured initially that it could have been worse.

If it could have been, it wouldn’t have been by a lot.

Beca came into the army with nothing. No experience, no family and virtually no money. But that wasn’t much of an issue. She learned quickly and eventually started to perform at the same level as the trainee soldiers who’d come in straight from cadets. From the start though, she’d outclassed everyone at shooting. Her assessors were hopeful of her potential. What she gave up in strength, she made up in mobility. Not to mention that she could think well on her feet and make fast decisions.

There was one problem.

Beca did not get on with Commander Posen. Where Posen was traditional, Beca was unorthodox. Effective, yes, but not uniformly perfect to standardised technique. Then there was Commander Posen’s entire approach. That was what really irked Beca, got under her skin until it was unbearable. Sticking to the tried and true was all very well, but if a few small tweaks could save lives at a relatively low risk… Beca really could not see why Commander Posen was so blind. It wasn’t like she was being idealistic or foolish, or that her ideas had a low probability of success. Try as she might to not argue, Beca always ended up on Commander Posen’s bad side. Even when she didn’t try; Beca’s body language just always seemed to give away her true feelings.

The external officers judging her skills couldn’t fault her any more than they could another soldier. On the contrary, most of her scores were above average. But Posen was determined to give her a bad recommendation when she came out to Barden.

“Damn” Jesse whistled, “Still, Benji’s experience was a bit like that”  
“Really?” Beca turned to him expectantly  
“Not really, I…” he paused, “Well, kind of”  
“Tell me” Beca said, “I mean, unless you don’t wanna talk about it, or-“  
“No, no it’s fine, really” Benji assured her, “I’m just not sure it’s that interesting

Both Jesse and Benji had been under Commander Allen when they did their basic training. It was clear from the beginning that Commander Allen was a big believer in a soldier being the epitome of masculinity and macho. Which wasn’t exactly Benji, not by a long shot. From subtle hints and criticisms to outright comments, Commander Allen made it exceedingly clear that he did not think Benji fit to be a soldier. That he should quit, or work behind the scenes, or do anything but become a soldier. It was demoralising to say the least, although like Beca, his fellow soldiers seemed to like him regardless.   
  
Still, Commander Allen must have had some respect for Benji’s refusal to quit, because Benji was pretty sure he got an accurate recommendation before he went to Barden.

Hearing Benji’s story, Beca couldn’t help but feel sympathy. When she’d first seen Benji, she didn’t have him down as a soldier either. He seemed much too soft and fuzzy at the edges. Not that soldiers couldn’t be nice people (Beca hoped that she was a nice person, at least some of the time), but Benji seemed suited to a walk of life far from this one. Now, looking at his gentle face, Beca felt impressed. He hadn’t given up, or run away. That was more than she could say about her own life so far.  
  
“Commander Allen thought I was the archetypal soldier” Jesse interrupted her reverie, “So I win”  
“Whatever” Beca rolled her eyes  
“Although,” Jesse continued slyly, “It’s clear you’re the favourite of one Commander Beale”  
“Excuse me?”  
“An idiot could see you don’t need extra training” Jesse remarked. Benji nodded in agreement.  
“It’s because a soldier with a history of disregard for authority should be monitored. That’s basically what she said” Beca shrugged, doing her best to contain the urge to giggle  
“Yeah, because it’s really your disregard for authority she’s monitoring” Jesse chuckled. Beca glared down the comment she knew he was going to add next. She was surprised when it actually worked.  
“So that’s what the kids call it these days” Benji added. Beca didn’t have the heart to turn her glower to him, but there was also the fact that it’s hard to look scary when you’ve gone bright red.  
“You know Benji, I think we should be taking pointers” Jesse said, and it was Benji’s turn to blush.


	8. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca starts to reveal some of her past to her friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im running out of chapters on backlog. also i kinda realised that i havent written this whole thing very well but the idea for it is my child and im determined to see it through to the end. hope you enjoy!

All Beca could do was conclude that Jesse was about as mature as a twelve year old. But she’d known that the moment she met him, it was something tangible to his personality that had jumped out at her before anything else. Benji was a little better, although prone to the occasional comment and often to fits of giggles. Which was more endearing than annoying. Still, they were better friends than anyone Beca remembered knowing.

Their instruction had advanced; Beale Unit were being introduced to the Barden Army’s hand-to-hand combat technique  
“It’s fairly unusual to need to use this, but you always have to be prepared. You’ve already been trained in hand-to-hand, but for continuity throughout our forces it’s required that we teach you what we teach our soldiers” Chloe had begun. It wasn’t particularly difficult, given that they’d all be trained in another style, but Beca found the movements hard to follow just from watching and struggled with exactly what she was meant to do when and which arm went where. This did not go unnoticed. Jesse and Benji were not left laughing at Beca’s tentative motions for two minutes before Commander Beale strode over  
“You seem to be struggling” she commented evenly  
“Sorry, I just can’t seem to get the movement” Beca apologised in a flustered, frustrated tone  
“It’s perfectly natural to struggle at first, you don’t have to worry. I’ll help you”  
“No, I… it’s fine, I” Beca grasped at sentences that wouldn’t quite form, but Commander Beale interrupted her  
“It’s alright if you didn’t get it from looking, the important thing is that you learn it in the end. I’ll guide you first, then you can try them on Swanson and Applebaum. We’ll be doing some proper sparring later” she finished, her last remark wiping the smirks off Benji and Jesse’s faces.

When Commander Beale started to physically move Beca, the latter’s face was nothing short of completely crimson. She didn’t want to contemplate what Benji and Jesse were saying, because otherwise their sparring later might end in a real injury. Luckily, she picked it up quickly once she actually knew what to do and was soon permitted to go back to her punch bag. With a grasp on what she was meant to do, Beca started to attack her punch bag relentlessly, with considerable venom.  
“You’ve sure got a lot of aggression for such a tiny, tiny human” Jesse commented  
“I find the best way to practice hand-to-hand” Beca explained, without looking up or stopping, “Is to think about my dad. Then I can really get into it, you know?”  
Jesse raised his eyebrows at Benji, who looked concerned. Unbeknownst to any of them, Beca’s comment didn’t go unheard by Commander Beale, though she said nothing.

“You sure learned fast” Benji said as he sat down  
“Sorry dude” Beca winced a little. She’d slammed him down pretty hard  
“It’s fine” Benji laughed, “I just wasn’t expecting to hit the ground so fast”  
“I’m just glad I didn’t have to fight you” Jesse relaxed into his chair, then promptly looked very surprised  
“What is it?” Benji asked as he turned his head. Beca followed suit, to see several commanding officers walk in. They laughed at the sight of the entire room of Scion soldiers staring with expressions from moderate surprise to complete shock  
“We might be your commanding officers, but that doesn’t mean we can’t socialise with you” one man laughed in a deep voice, “When we’re free and we feel like it, we can come here if we want”  
The silence quickly dissipated into amiable chatter as the commanding officers made their way to talk to various different groups.  
“That’s odd” Benji mused, “I like it though. It feels more like we’re a force fighting together”  
“Hey, there’s Commander Beale” Jesse grinned and without hesitation, waved at her.   
“Evening Swanson, Applebaum, Mitchell” Chloe nodded before taking a seat, “How are you all doing?”  
“I’m good” Benji said and Jesse nodded in agreement  
“Yeah, I’m alright” Beca added. Commander Beale looked at her for a second, before asking  
“Are you sure? I heard the comment about your father, not intentionally”  
“Oh, that” Beca laughed, somewhat darkly  
“Yeah what was that about?” Jesse asked  
“I can go” Commander Beale offered quickly, “I understand if you don’t want me to hear this, given that I’m your Commanding Officer and this is a personal matter”  
“No it’s fine” Beca shrugged, “I don’t even know how personal it is really. My dad’s kind of a big deal on Scion, he’s a leader in chemical research and also teaches at a university now. He split from my mom, I saw her a few times but,” Beca swallowed, “She died when I was eight. We were ridiculously rich and once I was old enough to realise other people were poor, it freaked me out. A lot. My dad was pretty strict so I tended to rebel against him”  
“That’s understandable” Benji commented  
“I guess.” Beca said, “But that’s really just the start. When I was, maybe eleven or twelve I think, I started to realise that I was into girls. Which I very wisely kept from him. He was… not okay with that kind of thing. And honestly, I thought I’d make it through to eighteen, that I could wait until I lived alone to finally break it to him and bear the consequences. It sucked and I started to hate him, but I could do it. Then Alyssa happened”  
“What happened?” Jesse asked  
“It wasn’t really bad, like we weren’t having sex, just kissing. We weren’t even dating, we were just messing around I guess” Beca smiled sadly, “That probably made it worse. He came into the room and the first thing that happened was I told Alyssa to go, because I could see how mad he was and I honestly had no idea what he would do. Then he yelled at me and asked me if I was gay. Well that’s not the actual word he used but…” Beca vaguely gestured, “You get the idea. I told him liked guys and girls. Which didn’t make anything better, actually”  
“Did he kick you out?” Benji’s voice was almost a whisper  
“No, but he threatened it and worse. I up and left before he could carry any of it out. Crashed at Alyssa’s for a while, then joined the army and that’s that”  
“Shit” Jesse murmured. Beca had never seen him so serious  
“That’s messed up” Commander Beale spoke for the first time, “No-one’s cared about that sort of thing for a long time here. People just go with it”  
“On Barden it varies hugely. Depending on which country you’re from, but other things too, like wealth. Me and Benji come from a town just outside Osiris, that’s the city where Beca’s from, and no-one cared where we lived”  
“That’s right” Benji said  
“People in Osiris didn’t really care either, on the whole. My dad was just a…” Beca looked at Commander Beale and then didn’t finish her sentence, but instead said, “Still, it happened and I can’t change that. Besides, it gives me a little motivation every now and then”  
“That’s an admirable attitude” Commander Beale stood up, “I feel I’ve intruded, but I’m glad you can be so open after all of that. Our system is pretty different and that takes some getting used to, so I’m sorry if you didn’t want me to hear all of that. I’m going to go and see the rest of the unit”  
“Bye” Jesse, Beca and Benji said in unison  
“What were you gonna call your dad?” Jesse asked  
“You don’t want to know”  
“I do”   
“You don’t” Beca assured him  
“I do”  
“You two!” Benji teased  
“Fine,” Beca sighed, “But it isn’t pretty”


	9. Friends, Feelings and Fucked Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca's been trying to avoid this conversation, but she can't run from it forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and we're back! ive been busy/on holiday and im going away to america tomorrow for a couple weeks so we're on hiatus again. Hope you enjoy!

“We have to do more theory?” Jesse exclaimed  
“Yes, Swanson” Commander Beale chided gently, “All Barden soldiers are required theoretical knowledge of past achievements as well as some tactical information”  
“Then why didn’t we learn this at the start?”  
“Because it would be easier for you to learn once you were accustomed to our way of doing things. Now stop whining Swanson. Mitchell, Knight, try to look a little more enthusiastic”  
  
The Scion soldiers had easily slipped into the lifestyle of the Barden army. It reminded Beca of some of her father’s books she’d read. He’d had a lot of books on ancient history, for a professor of chemistry. Back when people had used gunpowder for their weapons, there were groups of thieves who lived on boats. Not proper boats, strange boats made of timber and fabric. From what Beca had read, they had communities were almost like individual, miniscule countries, with their own languages and laws. Their captains were almost completely equal to the rest of the thieves except for one thing; they had command in battle. Beca felt like the Barden army pretty much used this exact principle. It made a lot more sense to her than Commander Posen’s opinions, that was for sure.

On the whole, learning tactical warfare and the history of Barden was fairly fun. Beca had always liked history. If anything, learning the military history of a planet not her own (a planet which felt more like home than anywhere she’d been since she last went to her mother’s) was far more interesting than anything else she’d ever studied. It was more interesting than the geography, anyway.

Jesse was evidently far less enthusiastic than Beca. He spent large amounts of time trying to get her attention, usually resorting to annoy a response out of her (at which point he would proclaim his victory). Two things were pretty clear. One was that Jesse would much rather be doing than learning. And the other was something Beca was steadfastly pretending she didn’t know. Ignoring, in the hope that she would never have to confront or deal with it, because she really didn’t want to ruin everything.

But that could only work up to a point.

She almost saw it coming, when she wasn’t convincing herself it would never happen. Could see the time looming closer and closer, circling in and ready to pursue her. Beca really, _really_ didn’t want to have this conversation. But when Jesse held her back as everyone else trampled off to the rec room, she knew her choice no longer mattered. Well, she supposed, you had to face everything someday, right?  
“Hey Bec, can I say something” he asked, with a considerable amount of seriousness to his tone  
“Sure” Beca’s throat felt dry. It was obvious, what Jesse was about to say, like the next line of a play, but still she was going to let him continue without giving even a hint that she’d already caught on. She was pretty sure she was more scared than he was at this point  
“Okay, so this is kinda scarier than I was expecting” he laughed nervously and then paused for a while, collecting himself together before blurting out, “But I like you”  
“That’s good, we’re kind of friends you know” Beca replied sarcastically. She immediately winced internally; she either sounded stupid or like an asshole. Neither of those was an option that sounded good right now.   
“You know what I mean. Like in a romantic, sappy, you’re hot and amazing way” Jesse sighed, “Look, this is sudden and probably annoying and I’m sorry, I really am. I don’t want to inconvenience you or anything. I just, I guess felt like I had to say it”  
“Listen,” Beca said slowly, working out her words carefully, “I’m glad you’ve been honest, so I will be to. I can’t say that I didn’t see this coming, but I was hoping I’d never have to actually, you know, address this”  
“Sorry” Jesse said again  
“Dude, it’s okay. It’s probably good for me to do this, honestly, hoping it would never be something I’d have to actually deal with was pretty cowardly of me. But I… I don’t feel that way about you” The words cascaded out of Beca’s mouth, much quicker than anything else she’d said. Jesse didn’t say anything for a while. The ensuing silence prickled uncomfortably on Beca’s skin and for a short moment she was worried she’d really hurt him  
“Are you-“  
“I’m fine, I’m fine” Jesse interrupted, looking at the floor, before fixing his gaze back on Beca, “Really, I am. I mean, obviously I’m disappointed, but it was more… well I didn’t really expect you to like me that way. I wanted to get everything sorted in my head and this was the best way. I had to check”  
“I don’t follow” Beca furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. Get everything sorted? Check? This sounded less like a confession and more like a shopping list  
“Benji” He replied simply, “I like the both of you and before I went there, I wanted to check that this side of things is something I can forget about. That must sound really strange and actually really insulting”  
“No, it’s okay” Beca laughed  
“I just, I don’t usually like just one person at once. Which is a pain, because I’m not really into dating multiple people at once, it’s just not my thing. God I must sound cold”  
“Not really” Beca shrugged, “Everyone’s a weirdo. Anyway, I think you should go for it with Benji. He’s definitely into you”  
“Honestly, I’m nervous” Jesse leant back against the wall, “It’s different to with you. I felt like, before I told you, that we’d move past it. But with Benji, it’s like I’ve got to get it right. I don’t want to mess it up. It’s just attraction in a different way”  
“I get it” Beca patted him on the shoulder, “But I don’t think you’ll fuck up. You’re a pretty good guy, you seem like you do these things well”  
“Well, it’s not just that I’m scared” Jesse sighed  
“Stop making excuses” Beca elbowed him   
“It’s not an _excuse_ ” he protested, “As you reminded me on the way here, we’re going into real combat. It’s all jokes now, but soon we’ll be fighting. I’m scared to get involved with someone Becs. There’s no point”  
“I guess” Beca conceded, “You and Benji would still be super cute”  
“You think? You’re breaking my resolve here. But seriously,” Jesse turned a little so he was fully facing her, “We’re cool, right? This is really weird, I know, it’s because the way I work is _weird_ , but we’re still friends right?”  
“Are you kidding?” Beca let out a short laugh of disbelief, “You’re so honest that it’s halfway to being fucked up. Definitely worth being friends with. You and Benji are the best friends I ever remember having and how long have I known you? We’re very much cool”  
“You’re not” Jesse grinned and within a split second Beca’s elbow had gone straight into his ribs  
“Let me live” Jesse rolled onto the floor, laughing crazily  
“Maybe” Beca rolled her eyes, holding out her hand to help him up. To her surprise, but a groan of “I knew it”, he pulled her straight down onto the floor. Beca crash-landed straight onto Jesse, who let out a grunt of pain before continuing his hysterical laughter. Beca crawled off him, before pronouncing him to be “the worst”. But on the whole, Beca reckoned he was probably the best friend she’d ever had.  
  
“You know,” Jesse said as they made their way to the rec room, “I knew you were gonna say you didn’t like me”  
“How?” Beca asked curiously  
“Because you’ve got the hots for Commander- Ow!”


	10. Realisation Dawns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beca can disregard Jesse and Benji's teasing as much as she wants, but it's a lot harder to ignore yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry ive been silent on this fic for so long! I've been away (in America, which wad fun) and busy and so much stuff, but I'm back with chapter 10. Hope you enjoy!

If anything, Jesse and Beca became even closer. Jesse still continually teased her, and Beca still continually elbowed him in the ribs, but their friendship had solidified into something that could never break. Beca made it her sworn duty to tease him about Benji at every opportunity (which she figured was only fair given his treatment of her). Anyway, it was bound to happen eventually; he would thank her later.

Beca had always had a few friends, but only a few. She hadn’t wanted any more than that; people were only fun to be around if they were decent. Otherwise, it was exhausting and Beca really couldn’t see the point. She’d been friends with a boy called Trey until high school sent them separate ways. Trey was a scruffy looking kid. His curls were constantly hanging in front of his eyes, ever-present dirt smudged on his face and somehow scratches and bruises from yet another adventure adorned his arms every other day. Probably not what Beca’s father had had in mind for Beca’s first friend, but even he would rather she have Trey than no-one.

Trey had let her play with his toy truck on the first day of school (more specifically, he thrust it into her arms with a “You try”) and since then they just stuck together. They enthused heavily about vehicles: both of them swore to become mechanics one day, spacecraft designers the next. Beca had absolutely adored Trey’s house; there was so much stuff to explore and climb, as opposed to her father’s stuffy reprimands of “don’t touch that”. It had been a real friendship and maybe she was just bad at keeping up communication, but once she stopped seeing Trey almost every day, the impulse to stay friends slowly died.

Once she started her next school, Beca made a few friends. There was Ollie, Cas and of course Alyssa. Beca hadn’t had friends who were girls before Cas and Alyssa. Cas’ mother actually worked with Beca’s father, so they’d been pushed together and, luckily, got on. Looking back, Beca dreaded to think what her life would have been like then if they had hated eachother. They met just before school started, when Cas and her mother had come round so the adults could discuss some kind of complex chemical analysis report that Beca had heard far too many angry calls about. Cas had waltzed straight in and asked Beca if she ever drew things right after she asked her name.

Through Cas, as well as learning the pleasures of drawing, Beca met Ollie- one of those kids who could pick up practically any instrument and just play it, a musical genius (though an absolute nightmare for remembering anything else) who Beca thought she’d heard mentioned as making it big on an interstellar level recently- and Alyssa. She’d been an eye-opener for Beca.

“I bet she was” Jesse laughed, interrupting Beca  
“If you don’t shut it, I won’t tell the rest of the story. Well no, I’ll tell _you_ ” she directed at Benji, “But nothing for you unless you keep quiet, my friend”  
“Noted” Jesse grinned, clearly not finished with his ribbing, but eager for Beca to continue

Alyssa’s parents were very well-to-do (like everyone in Beca’s school; her father wouldn’t have sent her to a normal school; imagine the horror of it!), but not in the same circles as Beca’s father. Alyssa’s mother was a member of the current ruling government of Scion and as for her father… Beca didn’t remember, but she was pretty sure he led a quiet life as an architect or something. Alyssa had pretty much all the freedom she could want. At the time, it was a wonder for Beca, to see someone so utterly confident and carefree. Alyssa wanted to be an artist, she thought, but she said she might change her mind whenever. Beca envied her; her own father wanted Beca to go and work into the government. On the other hand, Alyssa’s parents just wanted their daughter to do what made her happy.

When Beca started to get a crush on Alyssa, it seemed like everyone around her had been waiting for the inevitable (looking back, Beca couldn’t help but agree. Subtlety had been weakest suit then and it still was now). Unlike a lot of first crushes, Beca actually got lucky. Not that they ever went out. Beca didn’t want to get involved in that way. Part of that was probably her father’s dialogue, repressed but still present in the back of her head, but it came from herself as well. She never even figured out if she wanted to date Alyssa, not really. Beca just knew that she really wanted to kiss her and really, _really_ enjoyed actually doing so.

“That sounds pretty cool, actually” Benji said  
“Yeah, it was fairly relaxed. I think that kind of thing’s good when you’re a teenager” Beca mused  
“I did a similar thing with my friend Seb” Jesse said, “He moved away when I was 15, but we had some fun times. Then I went out with my friend Tess” he winced, “Bad move. We never talked again one it was over”  
“I wasn’t so lucky” Benji shrugged, “I had a couple of boyfriends, but nothing serious really”  
“Oh, I bet you had fun Jesse” Beca smiled wickedly  
“Shut up, like you didn’t do the same with Alyssa”  
“I..” Beca spluttered, “Let’s not go there”  
“No, no, no” Jesse put a hand on her shoulder, as if to stop her physically getting up, “You did, right?”  
“Yes” Beca mumbled very quietly  
“I knew it!” Jesse punched the air, “Well, it’s a good thing you’re experienced, ‘cause-“  
“No” Beca said indignantly. Jesse didn’t even need to go any further: she already knew what he was talking about, “Stop it, it’s not a thing”  
“It is” Jesse and Benji said in unison. As they hi-fived, Beca continued to argue  
“It isn’t. She’s pretty and I admit I think she is, I mean I think everyone does, right? But no, I wouldn’t. She’s my commanding officer” Beca said, as if that closed the case, “Besides I don’t even want to go there that much”  
“You totally do” Benji asked, “What does it matter if she’s your commanding officer?”  
“Jesse you’re rubbing off on him too much” Beca complained  
“Never a bad thing and anyway, he’s right. She joins you when you run all the time, and when she talks to you, you don’t look anywhere near as irritated as when I did it”  
“That’s because _you’re_ annoying”  
“And you never complained even once about the extra training taking up your free time”  
“I didn’t have anything better to do, did I?” Beca retorted  
“You always look at her” Benji pointed out  
“Because she’s my commanding officer and she’s addressing me. That’s being polite- not that Jesse is familiar with that concept”   
“That is a lie, you look at her _all the time_ , and besides you were telling me two days ago how much you admired her hair” Jesse chuckled.   
  
Beca said nothing; that was perfectly true, she had indeed said that. But Commander Beale’s hair _was_ really nice, anyone could see that. It was an amazing, vibrant colour, curling just a little in some places so that the strands that fell when it wasn’t tied back to perfect neatness framed her face perfectly. And then there were those perfectly placed highlights (natural or sun-induced, Beca didn’t know). They were like beautiful brushstrokes of something between ginger and blonde. Anyone would be jealous of Commander Beale’s hair, that’s what it was. And the red locks really brought out her blue eyes, which were brighter than the skies of Barden and yet seemed deeper than oceans, and they twinkled so prettily and…

Fuck.

 _Fuck_.

Beca didn’t know it but, quite the opposite from blushing (a common occurrence for her), she’d gone extremely pale and her eyebrows were slightly quirked, as if she had just heard something utterly absurd. Jesse burst out laughing; she couldn’t have said more with so little  
“Oh, she’s finally realised!” Jesse’s grin looked like it was going to eclipse his entire face. Clearly he was trying his hardest not to guffaw, although how long he would succeed was debatable  
“Fuck” Beca whispered, “Fuck. I’m fucked” She was staring at the floor as if it contained some undiscovered wonder as yet untold to the world, “This is worse than when I liked Miss Lloyd”  
“You haven’t told us about that one” Jesse started to ask  
“Dude, I’m… just no” Beca sighed deeply again, “What the fuck do I do?”  
“Go for it” Benji said encouragingly  
“Yeah,” Jesse interrupted before Beca could laugh, “I’m pretty sure she’s been flirting with you”  
“She’s my commanding officer!” Beca repeated shrilly, prompting several curious looks  
“I think the meeting she’s currently in seven rooms down didn’t quite hear you” Jesse rolled his eyes, a smirk spreading across his face. Beca slumped, leaning on the table and putting her head in the hands as she groaned something incomprehensible that was undoubtedly decorated with swear words. At almost that exact moment, Commander Chloe Beale herself walked past, evidently having finished said meeting  
“Bedtime already, Mitchell?” she teased, slipping in a small wink. Beca, who had jumped noticeably at the sound of Chloe’s voice, slumped right back down the moment Commander Beale was gone  
“She definitely flirted with you” Benji said  
“Totally” Jesse added. Beca made an inhuman noise of annoyance, which caused further laughter.

Of all the people, at all the times, it just had to be her.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is much appreciated, though if you have questions then you're best off heading over to lostbechloe.tumblr.com (hope to see you there!)


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